With the six nations in full swing, the business end of the football season approaching and best men all over the world frantically planning stags, I thought it apt to focus on how multiple best men can really help or really hinder each other.
In these modern times it's not unusual for a groom to choose two, three or even four best men. This comes down to a number of things, the fact that people are less likely to stay in one place all their lives these days, different experiences create different friendships and this is represented by choosing best men who cover the different phases of your life. As a generation of men we are also a lot more sensitive and emotional and are simply not cut out for the cut throat decisions our Fathers and Grandfathers made concerning who was getting the gig. Thirdly, quite often several heads are better than one when it comes to the immense responsibility that goes with organizing a stag these days.
Our choices of best men tend to cover the different aspects of our personality. We've all got the solid, dependable mate who is always at the end of the phone if we need them and has stopped us making numerous horrendous mistakes over the years. Then there's the mate we phone when we've just been paid and want to start drinking as soon as possible and ideally end up in a stolen pedalo hammering down the Thames. Ideally there's also the mate who fits somewhere in the middle between those two.
I have shared a best mans role a few times and luckily I was very good friends with the other guys. However, I've attended many a stag where the best men have failed to agree on things and it's made the whole process a lot more complicated than needs be. It's important to remember that the most important person in all this is the Groom to be. They're nervous enough about the stag as it is and they don't want to spend the first night holding two of their best friends apart whilst dressed as a Chicken.
As illustrated by the famous occasion Lee Bowyer and Kieron Dyer came to blows on the pitch, pressure can do funny things to people who are thrown together. Organizing a stag is difficult, people flake out at the last minute, get ridiculously drunk at airports and often act like five year olds as soon as they have to do something they don't really want to do. As a joint best man you need to rise above all the drama and remember that it's a few days out of your life but hopefully one of the best experiences your friend will ever have. It's important to put differences aside and focus on the important things, like how you are going to get twenty five Smurfs into a club!